From the "Yay Technology" files:
Clue gets Awesomeness Upgrade - includes texting. Ms. Scarlet still did it.
Scientists create false memories in flies, now chasing Eliza Dushku.
Doctors can poison you into suspended animation.
Complete guide to JailBreaking your iPhone. Hmm... I do have a 1st gen iPhone backup now....
And now in "OH THAT MAKES SENSE LOL" files: